In keeping with the holiday season, I thought I'd use a little artistic license in reworking Clement Clarke Moore's poem, that, by the way, is actually originally titled "A Visit from St. Nicholas." This was originally penned for a business group I attend, but, at my staff's urging, I've incorporated it as my latest blog. Although clearly meant to elicit a smile, there is a message in it that transcends the holidays….divorce can be peaceful. I hope that's one holiday message you take to heart!
T'was the night before X-Mas and all through the house,
There was a lot of fighting among many a spouse.
Momma was locked in a fearful stare
Hoping the police soon would be there.
The children were nestled all snug in their bed,
While dad threw something at momma's head.
For the Jews it was a latka, for the Christian it was beer,
That was their meaning of holiday cheer.
When out from the roof they heard a great clatter
Why it's family law atty Cindy Vova arriving and looking much fatter.
Quicker than "briefs" her staff they came
As she whistled and shouted and called them by name:
On Vicki and Helvi and of course Helena
We gotta fix this before things get any "meana"
With a briefcase full of books and memos of law
I listened as she read the list of them all:
Injunction, alimony and equitable distribution,
child support a parenting plan...I have a solution.
Yes the resolution to your marital consternation
Is to send you both quickly to mediation!
And all of the sudden on that X-Mas eve
Those two realized they could settle before she would leave
And as quick as she came, she fled from the site.
Merry X-mas Happy Hanukkah to all and to all a good night
Amazed the couple watched as she continued with her journey
And all they could say is "that's one hell of an attorney!"
Whatever your beliefs, however you celebrate, on behalf of my office, I wish everyone peace, prosperity and happiness in the new year!
www.vovalaw.com
Saturday, December 13, 2014
Tuesday, December 9, 2014
Cohabitation Agreements-The Gap Between No Commitment and Marriage
One of
the first things I ask when meeting with a new client contemplating divorce is
the date of marriage. What I often hear
in response is, “Well we’ve been married ___ years (fill in the blank, it is
usually under five) but we lived together
for 10 years (or fill in the blank) before
that.
So I’m
thinking, thanks for the information, but as it pertains to your rights and
responsibilities in a divorce in Florida, it is not really relevant. You see,
Florida is not one of the states that recognize common law marriage, at least
not since 1968, when it was outlawed.[1] Common law marriage, in those states that
still recognize it,[2]
essentially establishes that a man and woman who lived together and, for all
intents and purposes, held themselves out as husband and wife, for a certain
number of years (requirements vary by state) are deemed married as if they went
through the legal formalities associated with nuptials.
Well,
let’s suppose that you are one of those folks who live in a committed (we hope)
relationship but one or both of you do not wish to get that “piece of
paper.” Fair enough, but since you don’t
want to even see the end of the (marriage) aisle, you probably are not looking
down the real road either. Here’s my
suggestion….take a look. And here’s my
solution: a cohabitation agreement.
“What’s
a ‘cohabitation agreement?’” you ask.
Glad you inquired. Essentially, a
cohabitation agreement, also sometimes referred to as a “domestic partnership
agreement,” is a binding contract between two people that sets forth rights and
obligations of the partners, particularly if there is a break-up down that
proverbial road. And while we are at it,
these agreements are not only for a man and women living together, but also for
(and more commonly used by) same sex couples who (don’t get me started) are
still unable to legally marry in many (Florida)
states.
Some of
the issues that can be addressed in a cohabitation agreement are:
-division
of joint debts, regardless of whose name the debt was incurred
-who
keeps the apartment lease, or the house purchased in only one name (but paid
for by the other or both)
-who
keeps (and pays for the car) that is jointly titled
-what
happens to the pets
-does
the inferior earning partner get any financial assistance if the couple splits
(or just a swift kick out
the front door-don’t laugh, I’ve seen it happen and without this agreement
there is typically no legal
remedy)
Such an agreement may also include
preparation of a health care surrogate form giving legal authority to one’s
partner to make medical decisions on the other’s behalf in the event of an
emergency, because, guess what, without it, no matter how many years you’ve
lived as a couple, the partner has no legal right to do so.
Some Florida counties, Miami-Dade, Broward and Palm Beach included,
permit couples to register as domestic partners by filling out a simple form
and filing it in the county of residency.
You can find Broward’s registry form at: http://www.broward.org/RECORDSTAXESTREASURY/RECORDS/Pages/DomesticPartnershipInformation.aspx
However, as of March 2013, 60
Florida counties had no domestic partnership registry. Even with the registry, absent a well crafted
document by a knowledgeable family law attorney, some of the other areas
addressed above are, well, still not addressed.
So,
if two people care enough about each other to be together day in and day out,
they should care enough about each other to commit enough to put a few things
down on paper. And if not….maybe it’s
time to get out now, before it’s too late.
[1] If
you’re really interested (and have nothing else to keep you entertained, here’s
a link for a list of states that recognize common law marriage or some
derivation of it: http://www.ncsl.org/research/human-services/common-law-marriage.aspx
[2] it
may be relevant if the parties had a lawful common law marriage in a state that
recognizes common law marriage and then moved to Florida and wanted to divorce,
but I digress)
Thursday, December 4, 2014
Happy Holidays from Florida Law. The Gift that Keeps on Giving!!
With the holiday season in full swing (yes, we all saw the Christmas displays in the department stores BEFORE Halloween), most of us are busy trying to get our shopping done, and find just the right gift for those on our list. So, when I read a recent case, I couldn’t help but think that this husband found the perfect gift. Not only could his wife (now ex wife) not take it back or exchange it, but she could re-gift it over and over and over.
The case, recently decided by 4 District Court of Appeals is Kohl v. Koh. Mrs. Kohl filed for divorce and also filed for damages resulting from assault by way of the transmission of HPV.
The trial court, and thereafter, the appellate court dismissed Mrs. Kohl’s request for damages from the sexually transmitted disease. Notwithstanding that Mrs. Kohl alleged that her (now ex) husband "engaged in extra-marital affairs and hired multiple prostitutes and escorts during the course of their marriage," that just was not enough to pursue a suit against him.
In fairness to the trial judge and the 4th District Court judges, they were only following Florida law (which…shout out there—that’s what the judges are supposed to do.) The law of this fair state requires that a party asking a court to recover damages as a result of getting a sexually transmitted disease from anyone (not just a spouse) must allege that the offending individual had actual knowledge that he/she "was infected with one of the sexual diseases set forth in Section 384.24, Florida Statute," and he/she "was informed that the disease could be communicated through sexual intercourse."
So, apparently, when Mrs. Kohl found out her husband was fooling around, before she slept with her husband, she had a duty to inquire 1) whether he had knowledge he was infected with an STD and 2) whether he had he been informed that he could pass this on as the gift that keeps on giving.
Because, I am sure that anytime one uses an escort service the first thing the escort tells her "customer" is that she has an STD, and thereafter, rather than fleeing, the customer then responds, "Oh, well, could you tell me whether your STD can be passed on to me and my wife back at home?" Are YOU kidding?
Interestingly, the way the statute is drafted, it seems that a spouse (and, actually, anyone engaging in sex with another) would have a duty to inquire each and every time he/she engages in sex with his/her spouse because, if not, then the burden is on the gift recipient to allege (and later prove) that his/her lying, cheating spouse knew of the infection and, further, was informed (by who?) that it was transmissible through sex. Sort of kills the romance, doesn’t it? And as for the gift that keeps on giving, maybe she should have asked for a gift card instead. Visit Our Webpage for More Information
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