So, I
know you’ve been at the edge of your seat waiting to find out what the bottom
five of the top 10 things are to consider before filing for divorce. Here, for your contemplation, is the rest of
the list.
6. Get organized. Surely, this helpful tip should not be
confined to people considering divorce.
This is just good life advice. However, as this applies to divorce, this
means getting all of your financial documents in order including pay stubs, tax
returns, bank statements, brokerage account statements, information regarding
real estate, credit card bills, loans, including mortgages, etc. Now, if you do not know where to find these
(because, as I often hear, “my spouse took care of all of this,”) now might be
a good time to either “look harder” or ask some questions. If your spouse asks
why, all of the sudden, you want this information, you can gently inform
him/her that if he/she died tomorrow you’d not even know where to begin to look.
(That person may advise that he/she has no intention of dying any time soon,
and you might gently persuade them otherwise). If you have a family accountant, you can also
contact this person because, if you file joint taxes, that accountant is also your
accountant and he/she has an obligation to provide you (the client) with
information. Equally as important is
organizing the information for your attorney. Our office is happy to do it for
you, but the more of the “easier” stuff you can do, the more time we have to do
the “hard’ stuff, and that’s why you are hiring us to being with.
7. Close joint accounts. Okay, so that’s why these tips originally
came from the financial analysts and not the attorneys. There are times when this is good advice. However, it all depends on the circumstances
and the best thing to do is, in advance of taking this action, speak with a
family law attorney so you can give the attorney all the facts of your
particular situation and the attorney can give you sound legal advice.
8. How’s your credit? Do you even know? Once yearly you can obtain, free of charge,
your credit report from Experian, Equifax and Transunion, the three major
credit reporting agencies. If it’s not-so-good, you might want to try to
improve that before the divorce. Once
divorced, without good credit, it may be difficult to rent an apartment, obtain
a credit card or, among others, get a car loan.
Bring your credit reports with
you when you go to an initial consultation with an attorney. If you don’t have a credit card in your own
name, try getting one now before you file, even if the credit line is small.
9. Hire the right team. I LIKE the advice from the Institute on this
one. “Your attorney is not your
therapist, and it will become very costly for you if you treat them this way.” I
truly believe I practice family law with a heart. However, I have a BBA, an MBA
and JD, NOT a PhD in psychology (not even an undergrad minor). So although I care deeply about all of my
clients, any therapeutic advice I give is solely from my years of hearing
stories and not from any formal training.
Now on the other hand, in hiring the right legal team, don’t always look
for the meanest and “sharkiest.” Time is money and the more you spend on vengeful
fighting, the less you end up with and the more your attorney takes, (and yes, P.S,
I’m still in the same house after 21 years, so that’s obviously not happening in
my office) See, I can give some good therapeutic advice, after all.
10. Take time for you. Advice we should all live by. And with that said, I’m off to the gym.
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